Weeping

Today my eyes are swollen from crying. After the funeral yesterday, I have felt a weight in my stomach like I haven't felt before. An ache. Losing my Grandmother is more painful than I imagined. I knew the day would come because she has been declining the past years. Today when I was talking about her, the clouds parted and the sun shined for a few seconds. The comfort I felt in that moment. Then the clouds rolled in and it continued to rain. Tears scattered around the garden. I went outside to gather some firewood and decided to dedicate this week to properly grieving. Cancelling all plans and meetings and just focusing on the simple aspects of healing: making my home cozy, lighting candles, fresh laundry, homemade soups, baked goods, going for swims, walking in nature, breathing in fresh air, and capturing the natural beauty and its lessons.

It's been a tremendous loss and nothing really prepares you for grief, even though you know they are slowly slipping away. Her spirit was very strong and in many ways I feel she lives in me, and I hope continues to live in everyone she inspired. I admire her qualities greatly. She was a wonderful neighbour, a kind and loving mother, a great hugger, a kind giver, very spiritual, and a wonderful listener. She called herself a White Witch 🤍✨🤍 She loved her community in Sunderland, and in many ways I want to honour her by sharing these loving qualities with this online community. She will be forever loved and missed. Forever my rock.

Everything is going to be alight

Enchanted

I had the most beautiful Sunday afternoon taking pictures near my house. Surrounded by this beautiful nature is incredibly healing. The photography ended with the most beautiful sunset and I just soaked in all the gold, purple, pink and blue. I hope from these photos you feel the beauty, the magic, and the healing energy here.

Into nature we go

An Afternoon with The Spirits

Hello to you!

Yesterday I spent some wonderful hours out in the nature around my homestead, breathing in fresh air and taking in the most beautiful Autumn sunset. I put together some moments from my time outdoors. I hope you enjoy watching it! I had so much fun creating this photo. And in many ways it was very healing as I was able to imagine standing in front of my loved ones offering them love and receiving their wisdom and guidance.

I took the following two images and created two layers in Photoshop to achieve the final result. This was the first time using Photoshop so I'm really happy with the results. I created three different spirit images. Which is your favourite?

Don't Be Afraid
Reaching Out
Wisdom Seeker

It's Time to Say Goodbye

What I would do to go back in time to spend some more cozy weekends at Grandma's house in Sunderland, England. 37 Rowan Close ♥︎ So much time I feel I missed with her because I was chasing fancy city jobs and relationships that weren't good for me at the time. This has been a hard lesson learned. Chasing your dreams take sacrifice, but make sure they are authentic to who you are. It's hard for me to not feel regret but I know I did my best with what I knew at the time.

Losing my Grandmother is like accidentally dropping something really special in the ocean. Never to be seen again. Some beautiful words from the funeral today that spoke deeply to my heart and gave me great comfort, "Go forth from this world on your eternal journey."

Today my Grandmother's body will return to the earth. Grandma, you are forever loved and remembered. I am grateful for the love and time you gave me. For the laughter and your big warm hugs. Rest in peace, Grandma. Enjoy your time with Grandpa, your sisters, your parents, your friends, your neighbors. I will move forward with my life carrying your strength and kindness in my heart. I will forever keep our fun and joyful memories alive. The door is always open for you to come visit me. Love you a million times around the Universe ♥︎

I'll remember you
The blessing of a long life
So many funny moments shared together
Queen!
Her Wedding Day
Love of her life

The Offering

This piece symbolises the offering to my ancestors. And the acceptance of their ancient wisdom. I took this photo yesterday and spent my hours well into the early morning playing around in Lightroom and Photoshop. I had so much fun!

The Offering by Annika Alexandra Jacobsson

All Souls Day

A day to honour those who have passed over.

With it being Autumn and traditionally in many cultures around the world a time to honour our ancestors. I can feel now intuitively how Autumn is heavy but invites a slowness, a groundedness, a surrendering feeling of love. This is my first Autumn in Sweden and I can already feel it's opening me up to my feelings of loss. And I soothe myself by searching for the beauty in it through my art.

When Two Worlds Meet

If death can teach us one important thing, it's to embrace time. We all have time in our hands. But not knowing how much of it is the fact of life. How we use it is what matters most. Losing my Grandmother makes me think about how to live my life to the fullest. She would want that. Time is precious. No amount of money in the world can buy a second of time. And it's these thoughts that circle my mind that motivate me to create. I think the fear of not living is driving me to act. Whereas before, the fear of failing was holding me back. But not trying is failure. And I want to experience what breaking my limits looks like in my life. To surprise myself. Anyway, just some thoughts I wanted to share with you.

Candles and lanterns are dancing a waltz on All Souls Night

Have a beautiful evening and remember those who have passed are watching over you and want you to be happy ♥︎

An Inner Strength

Did you know that honeysuckle is Bohuslän's provincial flower? It's called Vildkaprifol in Swedish. It represents strength and adversity in the toughest of external conditions. For me the honey suckle represents knowing your own worth so you can walk down your authentic soul path in life. I am blessed to have this wild flower growing in my garden. There is still one left, hanging on as the cold winter sea winds come to greet the land.

Photographed by me at Ramsvik nature reserve in October 2024

Since returning home from the grounding retreat, I look at my surroundings with more presence. I feel excitement in my belly. Like a curiosity a child feels seeing the world for the first time. Curious about the earth and my gifts. I have always wanted to express but I felt a creative lock for a long long time. Probably, since I was a teenager. I have feared creating and expressing myself. It didn't feel safe. I lacked a sense of self.

In my young adult years, I bought into the false belief that money and a fancy office job would make me happy. It didn't. My life felt meaningless. During this time I sought comfort in romantic relationships but it never truly fulfilled me. I had a void that needed filling. I was the only one who could fill it. I craved true connection, fresh air, and a job where I could express myself creatively. So here I am, jumping into the unknown world of entrepreneurship. I feel free for the first time in a long time!

Of course, with my art business I would like to bring in enough income to sustain this lifestyle. I feel a freedom now to create, born from a courage in my heart. I don't know if this business will be successful, but I believe it can be with hard work and consistency. I always had this courage but it was layered with years of fear. Fear that I felt I released at the meditation retreat I went on last month. At the retreat I learned how to nature gaze and allow the power of nature to heal you. It really helped me release something stuck inside. Like a door that was locked and cob webby. Now something let go inside me and my soul can finally sing.

So much about being an artist is having a healthy mindset. Most artists are highly sensitive, so emotional wellbeing is a very important foundation, otherwise it can block creativity. It's important to keep the flow open, to stay present and breathe in moments where you notice your brain is misleading you.

In the last five years, I had to teach myself about healing and growing emotionally. I have now reached an emotional maturity and an awareness of self that I never thought possible five years ago. Back then I doubted it was possible, but I longed to become this woman who feels fearless and free. And now I'm here believing anything is possible. We are art after all.

In the face of adversity and twists in life, I still found my way forward. Just like the Vildkaprifol. Vulnerable and free.

I hope you are having a beautiful Saturday ꨄ

Cloud Gazing

Tonight the sun was bursting through the clouds. A reminder to keep the fire in my heart alive. As I was editing this photo I started to see animals and interesting shapes in the clouds. I'm curious to know what you see? What do you think the clouds are telling you?

Supernatural

For years I have been fascinated by Norse mythology. I always explored this theme in art school. It seems to be an interest that hasn't left me. I'm curious about my Scandinavian ancestors and the way they lived. It helps bring me new perspectives and ways of looking at the world today. On my Mum's side I'm Scottish and Irish, which also fascinates me. As I child I was fascinated by Celtic symbols and music. I have an old Irish ring, which I've had for years. I love embracing both my heritages.

As a child I loved dressing up for Samhein, our modern day Halloween. It was truly a time where my ancestors believed the veil between the two worlds were the thinnest. You never knew who was a spirit, hence the mischief of knocking on people's doors on hallow's eve.

My wild Viking cat, Leiana

The Norsemen, who lived in this area where I live today, believed that cats possessed supernatural powers, acting as guardians against evil spirits. When Leiana is around, I feel safe and my home feels protected.

Last night the wind howled leaving a spooky quality to the entire night. At one point lying in bed, I thought the roof was going to blow right off. But then I reminded myself that the people who built this house built it to fight the strong coastal winds and Thor's thunder. The thought brought a smile to my face, and then I fell quickly asleep.

♥︎